What is going on in there?
Are you someone who has vivid dreams? At night, do you experience wild adventures, or romantic escapades, or embarrassing onstage moments? Do you fly, breathe underwater, or run from monsters? When you wake up, do you remember your dreams? Do you ever wonder what those dreams are all about?
Dreams can be more than just nighttime escapes. They can also be uninhibited doorways into your subconscious mind, and shining a light on the subconscious is one of the key things I help people accomplish. If you are looking around at the life you have created so far, and saying to yourself, “This is not quite what I imagined my life to be” then perhaps this blog may have some of the answers you are looking for. If you feel like even though you have done everything you could to carve out the life you want, working hard day in and day out but still feeling frustrated, running in circles, and asking, “Why can’t I get any further?”, “Why am I struggling in my relationship?”, or “Why don’t my kids respect me?”, then perhaps your subconscious is the culprit.
Dreams can be a great tool for accessing your subconscious If paid attention to, they can spotlight issues in your waking life, allowing you to rethink and re approach situations from a new angle.
Since my childhood, I have lived many wild adventures and a few hauntings while asleep. I remember sleeping until noon as a young girl, not because I was tired, but because I loved to dream. On Saturday and Sunday those extra hours of sleep were a gold mine of adventures. Flying over cities, swimming while breathing underwater, being in the arms of the love of my life, camping on beautiful lakes, traveling to other dimensions, even speaking to psychics and Buddhist teachers. Even then my dreams were an important part of my life and each meaningful in its own unique way.
I will always remember one Buddhist teacher that really helped me get my shit together. In my dream I arrived in front of a man sitting on a Buddhist throne. As I sat at his feet I wondered, “Is this a friend?”, “A lover?”, “A guide?” At the same time that tea was brought to us in a big leather shoe, I felt that he was here to guide me. My eyes widened at the shoe/teacup, but I sipped out of it as if nothing was wrong.
He looked at me kindly and in a soft but strong voice said, “I want you to stop serving others right now and start serving yourself.” I looked at him and thought, wow, is this for real? I woke up within my dream, and thought, “Am I getting advice for my waking life right now?” He then said, “Inside of you is an Elm tree and your branches are a bit chaotic. Bring in your branches, as your energy affects others and even makes me feel uneasy, euphoric, and unbalanced.” I wasn’t sure what he meant by this, but those words stayed with me even after I woke up.
I have a message for you, wake up!
This dream happened during a time in my life when I was struggling. I had been divorced for two years and even though I was coming out of my fog, I still had no direction. I had been sucked into the dating apps and was burning precious time and energy on men who were not vested in lasting relationships which was prolonging my emotional ups and downs. I was moving through life, and especially these relationships, unconsciously. I was stuck and I didn’t even know it!
When I woke up from this dream I thought about the monk’s words and asked myself what they meant. The first message, to start serving myself, seemed pretty straightforward. But what about the Elm tree? What did he mean it was inside me? Why was it “chaotic”? I let the monk’s advice settle. Then I started to think about what it would look like to change this tree from chaotic to purposeful. What would I need to do? I realized I had been feeling pulled in many different directions as I tried to please family, friends, boyfriend and make sure my kids were happy, and follow all the advice I was getting. I realized that if I wanted to serve myself, I needed to take a different path. So, I asked myself, “What do you want?” I answered back, “To be confident in who I am, self-sufficient, get on my own two feet, and get to a point in my life where I don’t need a man, but want one.” I kept this image of the Elm tree close, and began to imagine the changes I wanted to make.
If I can be rooted in who I am, and learn to serve myself, the trunk of the tree will grow tall, sturdy and strong. If I can get on my own two feet, stop allowing myself to be pulled in many different directions, and focus on feeding myself with the right things the tree can grow into a full, healthy, vital Elm tree that attracts healthy things to it. If I let go of the need to please everyone and focus on myself, I can prune away the unhealthy branches and leaves.
It wasn’t long after that I broke off yet another unhealthy relationship and began to focus on the relationship with myself. This led me to eventually dissolve a business that had been weighing me down, go back to school, and hire a coach to work further on myself. It wasn’t easy! But I noticed that as the relationship with myself got stronger, opportunities began to find their way to me, and I knew I was on the right path. Because I paid attention to the dream, took time to discover how it related to my waking life, and took action, I completely changed the direction of my life.
How can I access my dreams?
“Spiritual meaning of an Elm tree represents physical and spiritual nourishment, transformation and liberation.
They are seen as powerful symbols of growth and resurrection.”
This is one example of how listening to your dreams can help you in your waking life. Dreams don’t have all the answers and they aren’t a magic pill, but they can show you what you have been missing while awake. They can be a catalyst for awareness, a spotlight on areas of your life that you have been sleepwalking through. Once you wake up, figuratively and literally, you can pay attention to those areas, and when you pay attention you are no longer passive. You get to make conscious choices.
Dreams are one tool to access your destructive patterns and assist in the development and growth of yourself, but you don’t need to be a dreamer to access your subconscious. There are many techniques you can use to practice awareness, but even if you don’t feel like you are a “dreamer”, you can experiment with remembering and paying attention to your dreams.
Many times, the conscious part of our brain wants one thing, but instead our subconscious runs the show, and many experts say that up to 95% of our brain activity happens there. “Whaat? You’re kidding!? Seriously?” I know right! This seems unfair at first glance, but some things should be automatic, like riding a bike or typing. Other things, like what kind of partner we are attracted to, probably shouldn’t happen automatically!
If you want to try accessing your subconscious through your dreams the first step is to have an open mind. Be open to receiving messages through your dreams. Keep a journal and set your intention before you go to sleep. Turn off the TV and social media, get quiet, and decide what it is that you want to know. Be very intentional by repeating what you want to know in your head over and over as you drift off to sleep. If there is an area of your life that you are struggling with or a specific question you don’t know the answer to, think of this and set the intention of finding the answer. When you wake up, you might first have to practice remembering your dreams. So, don’t just jump out of bed or reach for the phone! Take a few minutes to remember the intention that you set and see what you remember. Keeping a journal and writing in it immediately when you wake up can be really helpful too. Finally, have patience! It might take many nights of practice before you are successful in tapping into your subconscious.
Do this differently! Common! Trust me!
I dreamt I was on a huge pier with many wooden walkways leading to different places. I was with a group of friends hanging out on a half-submerged party boat at the end of a walkway. I decided to run grab some towels from my car but as I left, I noticed I had two small children with me. It was a bustling, crowded day and I wanted to get back to my friends, but the children were so slow! My car was so far, and the kids so slow, I just knew I was missing out on all the fun and relaxation back at the party boat.
So, when I saw two small chairs sitting empty among the crowd, I told the kids “Sit here and wait for me, I will be right back!” Yes! I could now run, grab my towels and get back faster! But as I began to run, I started to think, “Wait, what is your hurry? Why do you need to get back to the party so fast?”
My relief vanished, and I began having reservations about leaving the children. I thought “What are you doing? You shouldn’t leave these two small children all alone in a crowd! What if something happens to them?” Even as I rationalized my behavior, trying to convince myself that it was ok, they will be fine if I hurry, my fear grew. I finally told myself that if they were gone, I would not only be worried, but have to spend more time finding them. I would never get back to my friends!
I began shouting to myself,” NO!! Don’t do that, go back and make the effort, take the time and have the patience to do this with the kids! Do this Differently! Common! Trust me! Take a few minutes now and save yourself time and energy on the back end!!”
When I woke up, I realized I was going through the motions when it came to a very important part of my life. You can probably guess that what my dream was trying to tell me had to do with my kids, but what was specifically going on? How did I use this dream as a catalyst for change?
In my next blog I will tell you what actions this dream led me to take, and what changes resulted. I know you will find it interesting and helpful, especially in this time of social distancing and staying home with your family.
In the meantime, pay some attention to your dreams and see what they can tell you. See if you can develop and use this tool to access your subconscious. Many adventures await and many of those adventures are trying to reach you to help you set your life on course. As Gary Wright so simply stated in his song, “Dreamweaver”, Dream on, Dream on, Dream until your dreams come true….
